Calming
and coming off of
days flying weeks off
and deadlines
who's telling me to keep on posting
keep it up
and so you want to be a writer
not really a matter of want
hmm...
just sort of something that is
a part of this time
and that's not meant to be profound.
It's nice sometimes
to spend days alone
to self sustain
or try to
and to cook
for some friends
and not demand too much
to not overly identify
with some things and fumbles
or whatever
along the way
those crippling things
like what I wrote
about an alcoholic summer
that won't let me go
it's too much of me
at certain moments
and is crippling
but how do we
not become our decisions
what then
do we carry
and how to pick and choose
how to make do with
not even regrets
but changes of
(I'm not going to say heart).
Yesterday
the cool summer evening
took me to ones
that felt the same
in summers past
and I'd be lying
if I said summer didn't try to kiss me
the jacket weather
is fireworks
and long car drives and cries
and some really sad things
seeing love leave
and asthma attacks
waking up sitting
disabled in bed
old jobs cats
walks movies with
edamame appetizers
I'll always cherish always
yet this stuff came up
with a quickness
and I was trying to wait tables
trying shortly after
to sweep glass
and close tabs
while the wind and the water
on the tables
the people coming in
and out and a few shots of whiskey
were just like fishing in lily pads
trying to but finding
it difficult to reel in like that
reeling in like that.
2 comments:
beautiful.
thanks. i revised line breaks today.
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